i wish i had it going on

i need letters of interest, samples,
examples of pajamas in
bright flannel hanging checkered
stark against the

broken
door,

white walls, a white dog,
a cat purrs.
does it have a motor?
will you
move, you sit and
pull the covers tight.
they are also white.

why can't i find the answer
in my bright polka-dotted
socks? can i read in their
haphazard discard my future,
as leaves on the bottom of a
cup?

if i could glimpse one moment,
catch one tiny fragment
in that gold
reflection,
i would run so hard
in that direction,
never looking back
behind me.
but there is only
a black hole

key-
shaped.

i worry that the story
i'm telling isn't--

what, something changed.
i'm living the story. i live
among cellos and violins
play the soundtrack to
my life.

you know i live grandly
and see a great
many things.
this is why my eyes are
so sensitive and my
ears so sharp.

whisper
WHAT?

i see images of me.
I see short gelled spikes
and glossy lips
with the perfect,

you know...