interlude

what if we go?

speak the unspeakable.
it will break their hearts
and turn mine to sweet heavy lead. again.
(i don't know if it will hold. hold!)
and my boys. i hardly-

leave it. all that has become. became.
drop like a dead crusty cursing fly. fly
away.
mine.
haunt me.
familiar streets as ghosts, with buildings - faces -
and black window eyes that have seen me
these past years. seen. and heard. and felt me driving by.

what if all i've made has rotted?

what if we don't make it?

what if it hurts?
it hurts.